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What do you look for in a relationship

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Nice eyes? A great smile? A quirky sense of humor? Look for someone who:. Remember, that a relationship consists of two or more!

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: 12 Signs You're in a Healthy Relationship

14 Realistic Signs You’re in a Healthy Relationship

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Knowing exactly what you want out of a relationship is very difficult, especially if you're young or inexperienced. Even if you've dated many other people, every relationship is unique, and you might have different priorities now than you have had in the past. Finding out what you want in a relationship can be a laborious process, but it's worth it.

Christina Jay, NLP. Our Expert Agrees: Even if you're a perfect match with somebody on paper, it's okay if you don't feel any real chemistry with them, even after you've been on one or two dates.

Instead of trying to force it, just continue searching for your next match. To find out what you want in a relationship, first figure out the things you don't want, since this can help you better understand your needs. To do this, write down a list of non-negotiable traits in potential partners, such as not having anger issues, being lazy, or having a history of cheating.

Think about your past relationships and the relationships of your friends and family to help you figure out your non-negotiables. For example, if you have a friend who always has to tell their boyfriend where they are, you might put down that your partner has to be trusting.

For more tips from our co-author, including how to tell your partner what you want in a relationship, read on! Did this summary help you? Yes No. Log in Facebook. No account yet? Create an account. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. By using our site, you agree to our cookie policy. Article Edit. Learn why people trust wikiHow.

Christina is the founder of Preferred Match preferredmatch. There are 10 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. Explore this Article Determining the Deal-Breakers. Examining Your Needs. Dating Casually. Related Articles. Article Summary. Part 1 of Develop a list of non-negotiables. Sit down and put together a list of criteria that would disqualify a potential match first.

Research shows that common deal-breakers for those interested in long-term relationship are: [1] X Research source Having anger issues or exhibiting abusive behaviors Dating several people at once Being unworthy of trust Being already in a relationship or married Having health issues like an STD Having a drug or alcohol problem Being inattentive Having poor hygiene.

For example, if you think honesty is really important, you are unlikely to mesh well with a partner who lies. Find out your core values by answering these questions and looking for reoccurring themes: If you could change something about the community you live in, what would it be? Who are the two people you respect or admire the most? What traits do you admire about these people?

If your home caught on fire and all the living beings were safely out, what three items would you choose to rescue? Which moment in your life made you feel very satisfied? What happened to make you feel that way? Consider any previous relationship patterns.

Think back on relationships you have had in the past—whether romantic, platonic, or familial. For those relationships that ended badly, consider the factors that contributed to the relationship dissolving. What about those relationships left you dissatisfied or unhappy? Think about any issues you have noticed in the relationships around you. Surely, you have spent time with friends or family members who were in romantic relationships. Even though you were on the outside, you may have been aware of issues these individuals experienced.

For example, maybe your sister was devastated after her boyfriend cheated. You helping her through this time made you aware of how important it is to be faithful in a relationship. Learning from the mistakes of others may help you to enjoy a more satisfying relationship in the future. Part 2 of Love yourself first. Many people wrongfully search for a romantic partner to complete them.

However, your partner should only complement you—you should already be complete on your own. Feeling complete translates to having self-love that is not dependent on anyone else loving you. Show love to yourself by: [4] X Research source Creating a list of your favorite qualities about yourself e.

Speaking to yourself in a gentle, loving way as you would a friend Becoming aware of your inner needs and desires and living in accordance with them Caring for your body Managing stress Avoiding the tendency to dwell in the past—live in the now.

Think about what kind of relationship you want. What are your expectations, for both your partner and yourself? Try to be as impartial about yourself as possible. This will help you identify types of people you want to stop seeing and behavioral patterns that you want to end, which will help you figure out the kind of relationship you actually do want.

For example, you might think you're ready to settle down, but deep down you know you're not ready for that kind of commitment. Or conversely, you might think you just want to have some casual fun, but you know from past relationships that you get too emotionally invested.

Transform your list of deal-breakers into most important qualities. Go back to your list of deal-breakers. Transform your list of deal-breakers into positive qualities that you desire in a relationship. Add more 'nice-to-have' qualities as you think of them. Be completely honest with yourself. If physical attractiveness is a deal breaker for you, put that down.

But try to focus on qualities that don't have to do with looks, such as intelligence, patience, and empathy. You should also think about things like religion and politics, which may or may not be relevant to you. Don't leave anything out, no matter how embarrassing or trivial it seems. Be the person you want to date. One way to maximize on the process of discovering your ideal partner is to embody the traits you yourself are looking for.

This method allows you to check whether your expectations are realistic and it also gives you a chance to assess what you are willing to give in a relationship.

But, personifying the traits you desire makes you an attractive partner that will likely attract someone like you. For example, if physical health and well-being is an important quality you are asking for in a partner, strive to spend a month focusing wholeheartedly on your own health—eating well, exercising, fighting stress, and getting sleep. Keep up the good habits after the month ends. Part 3 of Go out with a few people with no strings attached. You can make lists and look at your past relationships for signposts, but the very best way to figure out what you want in a relationship is to start dating casually.

Go out for coffee, ice cream, or drinks with a few people who seem to meet your standards. Know your limitations before you step into this domain, however. You may not want to become physically intimate with several people at the same time. If someone seems to become serious, or you start feeling more attracted to one person over another, cut ties with everyone else and follow your instinct. Evaluate your compatibility with different suitors.

As you casually date a few potential suitors, consider how well each individuals matches up with your personal values, goals and dreams. Check to be sure no one is representing qualities from your deal-breakers list. Now is the time to cut off any ties with other suitors so that you can focus on strengthening the relationship you have with this person and maintain fidelity.

Visualize the relationship beyond the honeymoon phase. Every short-term relationship starts off by seeing your partner through rose-colored glasses. Everything the other person says or does is absolutely charming. In time, the perfect aura around this person starts to fade. Prepare yourself for this eventuality and start looking beyond the crazy-in-love phase to how things will be in several months or years.

For example, if cleanliness was important for you at the onset, are you going to be able to ignore how your girlfriend piles dishes in the sink for days on end?

Before you break up with the person for any perceived slight, consider that you are bound to dislike to some small quirk of your partner. Communicate with your partner.

If you come to find that you and your partner are quite compatible—sharing similar values, goals, interests, and outlooks on life, then it may be time to have a candid talk about where you stand.

Be straightforward about your feelings. Ask your mate for some quiet time and express your feelings about this relationship. I wanted to see how you felt about our connection and where we stand?

19 Things To Look For In A Partner That Have Nothing To Do With Sex Or Appearance

I just look for someone I connect with and hope that we are both on the same page. So how do I answer the question in a way that helps me filter out the jerks and time wasters whilst still keeping my options open? So, what if you used this question as a way to fantasize about the kind of person you are attracted to and compatible with rather than to define the kind of relationship you want esp.

Do you think of an intense romance complete with dramatic gestures, like this one? After all, we often see romantic love portrayed in unrealistic or confusing ways. In real life, good relationships with strong foundations generally share many basic features.

I just read a piece by Samantha Grove on the subject , and it inspired me to raise the question as well: is it true that you only find love when you stop looking? My intention is not to write an answer to her story, but to open a dialog with the opinions she expressed; and through the exercise of writing, also figure out what I think about the subject myself. If we want good friends, we say yes to brunch. If we want to lose weight, we eat less cake or try to. Why should relationships be any different?

What Should I Look for in a Partner?

Are you single and looking for love? Are you finding it hard to meet the right person? Life as a single person offers many rewards, such as being free to pursue your own hobbies and interests, learning how to enjoy your own company, and appreciating the quiet moments of solitude. For many of us, our emotional baggage can make finding the right romantic partner a difficult journey. Perhaps you grew up in a household where there was no role model of a solid, healthy relationship and you doubt that such a thing even exists. You could be attracted to the wrong type of person or keep making the same bad choices over and over, due to an unresolved issue from your past. Whatever the case may be, you can overcome your obstacles.

15 Things You Should Look For In A Relationship

Knowing exactly what you want out of a relationship is very difficult, especially if you're young or inexperienced. Even if you've dated many other people, every relationship is unique, and you might have different priorities now than you have had in the past. Finding out what you want in a relationship can be a laborious process, but it's worth it. Christina Jay, NLP. Our Expert Agrees: Even if you're a perfect match with somebody on paper, it's okay if you don't feel any real chemistry with them, even after you've been on one or two dates.

A strong sense of character. They are steady and certain in the knowledge of who they are.

Barton Goldsmith. Ever wondered why nearly half of all marriages in the United States end in divorce? Every person is different and looks for different things really complicated, we know.

Should You Look for a Relationship?

Common attributes that come to mind include intelligence, kindness, sense of humor, attractiveness, or reliability. We may think we are looking for a partner who complements us only in positive ways, but on an unconscious level, we are frequently drawn to people who complement us in negative ways as well. What this means is that we tend to pick partners who fit in with our existing emotional baggage.

We all know you shouldn't just throw yourself willy-nilly into the first relationship that comes down the pike. But what are the things you should look for in a relationship , specifically? For better or worse, we often hear more about the things you shouldn't tolerate in a relationship. Heading up that list, of course, is any kind of physical or emotional abuse — it is never OK to put up with behavior like that, and if you're experiencing such a thing, it's always a good idea to reach out and get help. All of that said, though, it can be a bit of a head-scratcher to sit down and puzzle out the things you absolutely need in a relationship.

10 Things To Always Look For In A Relationship

Thankfully, those things have nothing to do with musical preferences or I would have taken my country albums and left my Beatles-loving husband long ago. Relationships thrive when couples can express themselves freely and honestly. That means no topic is off-limits, and you both feel heard. Consistent communication is vital to building a lasting life together. But when people in healthy relationships fight, they fight productively and fairly. That means avoiding name-calling or put-downs. It also means striving to understand your partner instead of trying to score points. You apologize.

Mar 23, - Knowing exactly what you want out of a relationship is very difficult, especially so you would look for someone who seems to prioritize health.

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